I've always joked that my three majors aren't a result of overambition (or even plain ambition...), but indecisiveness. And it is really not a joke, but the plain truth. I really like psychology, Spanish, and political science. I couldn't decide which was more important to me. So I chose them all .... without knowing how they'd amalgamate, but just hoping that someday they did.
And for years, they remained separate entities. I studied US elections, abnormal psychology, and Spanish literature of the 1800s; everything remained compartmentalized. I was frustrated - putting effort into a triple major just seemed more nonsensical and less worth it as time wore on. Nothing felt right. I attended classes, took exams, wrote papers - and wasn't enjoying it, I was simply going through the motions. Things didn't fit.
I've realized that this has FINALLY changed. I've written a few recent papers that have shown cohesion between all of my majors. I just finished a Spanish research paper on the effects of the intended audience on politicians' rhetorical complexity. I drew upon my time in Chile, the Spanish language, psychological measures of complexity, political volatility in elections. I never expected that it would be Spanish linguistics that provided the outlet for my three majors, but it did. Now I'm working on a research paper that shows the effects of education on voter participation, especially in nationalized immigrant communities in the US. Things have clicked.
I've rediscovered how wonderful it is to hand in work that I'm proud of, rather than just assignments I've completed. I feel like these assignments have re-lit a fire under me. Things make sense. I'm passionate in what I'm doing again.
I lost faith in the fact that things work out the way they're supposed to. Even when things get tough, and seem as nonsensical as they had recently, I need to remind myself that I've never been entirely screwed over in the past. So today (and yesterday), I'm thankful for this reminder.
Oh. And this weekend, I also (#17) wrote a letter AND! (#20) did my laundry! WAHOO!!!
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